Well said. It just blows my mind how we can’t even talk about the fundamental need for strong families, particularly strong fathers, without people screaming about rights and choices.
I recently realized about how progressive myths are inversion of goodness. Gay marriage is seen as “good” yet overlooked is how it correlates with a steep decline in favorable attitudes toward marriage. Marriage was always about providing a stable environment for children. But people are far more willing to share what they don’t particularly value. Hence the culture wouldn’t have been so eager to redefine marriage as “love is love” if it still properly valued marriage and children.
A film I recently watched included an interesting detail. An unmarried man says to his lover, a married woman, “…. but in your wedding bed?” He is genuinely shocked because the nuptial bed once held deep sacredness: it was where the marriage was consummated, and where children were created and born. Even a cheater hesitated to desecrate it with infidelity.
I find I need to explain this over and over again: Progressivism reduces freedom to autonomy: a limitless but narrow range of choices, which traps people in perpetual adolescence. While true freedom requires the embrace of limits, as in commitments made & promises kept, the obligations that bind us in honor & faith, i.e. maturity.
Progressivism acts to replace the horizontal relationships that unite people into communities -traditionally understood- with vertical ties that bind atomized individuals to the State and its corporate handmaids.
My parents had a pretty bad marriage when I was a kid. Adultery. Verbal abuse. Long distance. Several years later their marriage did get better and I would say it’s happy now. I wouldn’t say it’s perfect or anything but happy enough. Everyday I am thankful for my husband and that I don’t have to endure a marriage like theirs for the sake of the kids. But flawed as they both are, they loved me more than they loved their pride.
I’m so glad my children don’t have to deal with examples of a broken family. They don’t have to memorize the names of a litany of steps and half’s and navigate difficult holidays, graduations and weddings, just like I didn’t have to. The family money wasn’t split into a million pieces by the die price. My children have something to inherit. My parents’ choices will echo down the generations and I am so grateful.
Divorce is terrible. But a lack of submission is it’s cause. When I was in the US Army I had the duty to obey my commanding officer. And I did not view it as oppressive. I viewed it as necessary so I could function and survive in war.
Marriage is a similarly solemn service - everyone must know the chain command and honor it. It’s the only way to survive when the Mongols - figurative and literal - come riding over the horizon, backlit by the morning sun. The husband answers to church elders and deacons, the wife answers to the husband.
I found this out the hard way. You can’t lead someone who refuses to follow.
Mutual submission to each other out of reference for Christ is of utmost importance. However, I do get concerned nowadays when men tout a woman's "lack of submission" as the cause of divorce or marital strife. In my situation, my father's lack of strength on behalf of others (my definition of masculinity) and chastity led to the end of my parents' marriage. You can't follow someone who doesn't want to lead.
Autumn, I’ll keep it simple. Men submit all the time to other men. I get concerned, in a mirror-like fashion, when women express concern about submitting to a man. I expect a husband to die defending his wife and children from harm. It is a moral expectation that the wife submit to his authority since he is wagering his life to defend her and their children.
As you might guess - I had a very difficult situation which forced me to conclude this (I did not want to conclude it, but reality demanded it). When men provide protection to their wives it can become invisible to the wives - not out of menace, but due to the natural process of taking for granted. When women start to act against their husband’s judgment, they essentially void his commitment of honor (I will die to protect my wife). It is then replaced with a sacrilege - “I will die for her whims”.
One thing that will make it hard for women to accept what I am saying is the fact that we’ve made modern living incredibly SAFE. But that safety can fall apart very quickly when it comes under sustained pressure.
And it goes without saying - neither wives nor husbands should commit adultery, and society ought to shame all parties severely when it does happen. Though, adultery does not have to end a marriage, it may lead to that.
Well said. It just blows my mind how we can’t even talk about the fundamental need for strong families, particularly strong fathers, without people screaming about rights and choices.
I recently realized about how progressive myths are inversion of goodness. Gay marriage is seen as “good” yet overlooked is how it correlates with a steep decline in favorable attitudes toward marriage. Marriage was always about providing a stable environment for children. But people are far more willing to share what they don’t particularly value. Hence the culture wouldn’t have been so eager to redefine marriage as “love is love” if it still properly valued marriage and children.
A film I recently watched included an interesting detail. An unmarried man says to his lover, a married woman, “…. but in your wedding bed?” He is genuinely shocked because the nuptial bed once held deep sacredness: it was where the marriage was consummated, and where children were created and born. Even a cheater hesitated to desecrate it with infidelity.
Yes, this.
I find I need to explain this over and over again: Progressivism reduces freedom to autonomy: a limitless but narrow range of choices, which traps people in perpetual adolescence. While true freedom requires the embrace of limits, as in commitments made & promises kept, the obligations that bind us in honor & faith, i.e. maturity.
Progressivism acts to replace the horizontal relationships that unite people into communities -traditionally understood- with vertical ties that bind atomized individuals to the State and its corporate handmaids.
My parents had a pretty bad marriage when I was a kid. Adultery. Verbal abuse. Long distance. Several years later their marriage did get better and I would say it’s happy now. I wouldn’t say it’s perfect or anything but happy enough. Everyday I am thankful for my husband and that I don’t have to endure a marriage like theirs for the sake of the kids. But flawed as they both are, they loved me more than they loved their pride.
I’m so glad my children don’t have to deal with examples of a broken family. They don’t have to memorize the names of a litany of steps and half’s and navigate difficult holidays, graduations and weddings, just like I didn’t have to. The family money wasn’t split into a million pieces by the die price. My children have something to inherit. My parents’ choices will echo down the generations and I am so grateful.
That last paragraph!!
Divorce is terrible. But a lack of submission is it’s cause. When I was in the US Army I had the duty to obey my commanding officer. And I did not view it as oppressive. I viewed it as necessary so I could function and survive in war.
Marriage is a similarly solemn service - everyone must know the chain command and honor it. It’s the only way to survive when the Mongols - figurative and literal - come riding over the horizon, backlit by the morning sun. The husband answers to church elders and deacons, the wife answers to the husband.
I found this out the hard way. You can’t lead someone who refuses to follow.
Mutual submission to each other out of reference for Christ is of utmost importance. However, I do get concerned nowadays when men tout a woman's "lack of submission" as the cause of divorce or marital strife. In my situation, my father's lack of strength on behalf of others (my definition of masculinity) and chastity led to the end of my parents' marriage. You can't follow someone who doesn't want to lead.
Autumn, I’ll keep it simple. Men submit all the time to other men. I get concerned, in a mirror-like fashion, when women express concern about submitting to a man. I expect a husband to die defending his wife and children from harm. It is a moral expectation that the wife submit to his authority since he is wagering his life to defend her and their children.
As you might guess - I had a very difficult situation which forced me to conclude this (I did not want to conclude it, but reality demanded it). When men provide protection to their wives it can become invisible to the wives - not out of menace, but due to the natural process of taking for granted. When women start to act against their husband’s judgment, they essentially void his commitment of honor (I will die to protect my wife). It is then replaced with a sacrilege - “I will die for her whims”.
One thing that will make it hard for women to accept what I am saying is the fact that we’ve made modern living incredibly SAFE. But that safety can fall apart very quickly when it comes under sustained pressure.
And it goes without saying - neither wives nor husbands should commit adultery, and society ought to shame all parties severely when it does happen. Though, adultery does not have to end a marriage, it may lead to that.